Mayor Bill Mauro and NAN Grand Chief Alvin Fiddler have not made any comments about this disgusting behaviour as of yet! Police Chief Sylvie Hauth also remains silent on the issue.


The hospital is remaining tight-lipped on the situation, but our sources indicate that the man’s cell phone was only mostly charged when he finally stopped his ruthless machete-assault on the kids play area. Locals don’t feel safe any longer. The man is clearly using one chair per butt cheek, disgusting!

Reports are saying that Antifa have put aside their issues with the Alt-Right and are both coming to kick this dude in the junk.

The man’s immigration status is currently being checked into by the border police and Justin Trudeau has apparently got his cheque book ready to pay this man for any suffering he may have incurred.


Word on the street is that the man’s potentially communicable diseases were communicated all over the children’s play area. Sources tell us that a team in hazmat suits had to clean the area shortly after. The Thunder Bay District Health Unit is expected to make a media release any minute regarding this incident.

A small town lawyer was seen in the area canvassing the general public and offering free services to anyone who felt impacted by this man’s actions, and wanting to sue him.

We will be continuously updating this article as more information becomes available.

Anyone who can identify this man is urged to stop what they are doing and contact hospital security and turn him in. (THIS ARTICLE IS SATIRE)

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  1. Satire or not – Justin Turdo would be first in line with the open chq book.

    Pino, I’m assuming this is a buddy of yours?

  2. I was at emerg the other day and I watched a nurse repeatedly kick an aboriginal man because he was sleeping and wouldn’t move his foot when she tried to get by with someone in a wheelchair. They weren’t little kicks they were full force kicks multiple times until he woke up. Then she swore at him and told him to get the hell out of the way. I also watched a staff member in emerg walk to the front of the triage desk, and sign her at least 12 year old son in. They went to the back where the doctors were, without waiting, and left with a prescription all within 5 minutes. There were people screaming in pain in the waiting room but the nurse’s kid with a sore throat didn’t have to wait like the rest of us. He got special treatment because mommy worked there. That place is such a joke.

    1. Vikki – your story seems a little embellished. Also, just because you were there first, doesn’t mean you’re going to get in first.
      Please, stop the race baiting.

  3. I left the hospital with my newborn baby who still had her unbiblical clamp on….(It’s suppose to be removed before leaving ) I ended up accidentally breaking it off and she had a fresh bleed. My husband and I had to call my mom to watch our three girls while we took her to the emerge (I still couldn’t drive) . We waited 4 hours altogether.
    The women behind the desk in the waiting area seemed to be trying to stall while her superior watched closely as we sat.
    Once finally behind the closed door we Waited In the furthest room for over 3 hours while nurses came and went to tend to the other elderly patient behind the curtain next to us who seemed to be dealing with an old back pain injury.
    Staff almost seemed to have forgotten us….i kept walking in and out of the room with my newborn to see of any staff would make eye contact with us. While my daughter continued to bleed (small drops) . It seemed the only staff who would make eye contact were those in our room tending to the elderly women who kept tell us” it won’t be much longer “.
    By the time my daughter was seen the bleeding had stopped and we were sent home with a hefty parking ticket, and a simple ” everything is fine “.
    Within that time the staff could have seen numerous patients. Had we been new parents this could have been much more terrifying of an ordeal. I honestly had never experienced this with my other children and I assumed my daughter was in severe distress as she was only days old with an active bleed.
    I had called labour and delivery and was given instructions and told specially to come in to the emerge if the bleed stayed active.
    As sad as it is I didn’t feel like anyone cared about my daughter or wanted to help her at all. The Dr seemed to be simply doing his job perhaps out of exhaustion from being overworked……

    1. Both my children cane hime with the little cream coloured clamp still attached and everyone else I know that has children were discharged after birth with that same clamp! I’m just curious as to weather or not your speaking of the same clamp or not as that one is always left on till it falls off? Hope the baby is doing well and is not in any discomfort!!

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